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Old December 24th, 2009, 02:41 AM
DFW333 DFW333 is offline
Red Tag
Join Date: Sep 2009
Location: Dallas, TX
Posts: 93

I love trying to see what I can get guests to believe as Im going through their bags. So far the most commonly believed stories (actually had 5 or more people turn to leave the park to comply with my instructions) are:

No Nike - Sir, we don't allow Nike products in the park anymore. Im sorry for the inconvenience, but this is a family oriented park and Nike is endorsed by Tiger Woods who is clearly not in line with our philosophy.

No Car Keys - Sorry ma'am, but we no longer allow car keys in the park due to a rash of incidents in which they were lost or stolen. The best thing for you to do to guarantee they are not lost/stolen would be to go lock them in your vehicle.

Bad Comb - Ma'am we only allow combs with 25 or fewer prongs, yours has (just make up a number).

No X-Brand Gum - Sir/Ma'am, I'm sorry but Six Flags has signed an agreement with Stride Gum. They've had a bit of a slump in sales because no one has even started their second piece and, in an effort to help them out, we dont allow any other brand of gum in the park.

Then there's the fun things to do at the metal detector:

Have the guests turn around and walk through backwards. For some reason four is the magic number on this, once you get four to do it the entire line will do it without being told. But if you stop at three, everyone else will come through walking forward.

When people ask "Can I have this?" as they hold up a map, tell them:
A) No, only people 21 and up can take it (only works on kids obviously)
B) Yes, but only if you swear to keep it out of the hands of the enemy
C) Maybe, just dont turn it upside down

As someone pushes an empty stroller up, tell them we dont allow invisible children into the park due to the impossibility of locating them if they become lost, and SF will not open itself up to that kind of liability. (Ive actually had at least two people say 'Well yeah that makes sense...')
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